San Diego · Telehealth across California · Ages 5 and up
Self-Esteem, Bullying & Friendships
Helping Children Find Their Voice and Believe in Themselves
When a child decides they are not smart enough, likeable enough, or good enough, it shapes everything, how they try, how they connect, how they see themselves. We help children quiet that inner critic and rebuild a steady, genuine sense of worth.
The way your child talks to themselves becomes the way they see themselves.
"I'm stupid." "Nobody likes me." "I always mess up." When a child says these things, it is easy to reassure them and move on. But a harsh inner voice, left alone, can quietly shrink a child's world. The good news is that self-worth can be rebuilt, and children can learn to speak to themselves with more kindness and courage.
What it can look like
Signs your child may be struggling
- Harsh negative self-talk
- "I'm stupid" or "nobody likes me"
- Giving up easily or avoiding challenges
- Perfectionism and fear of mistakes
- Constantly comparing themselves to others
- People-pleasing to be liked
- Trouble standing up for themselves
- Difficulty making or keeping friends
- Feeling different or left out
- Social worry or hanging back
- Sensitivity to any criticism
- Shrinking, or losing their spark
When your child is being bullied
Bullying leaves marks you cannot always see
A child who is being hurt by peers often stops telling anyone, and starts believing what is being said about them.
You might notice your child dreading school, coming home withdrawn or upset, complaining of stomachaches, losing interest in things they loved, or going quiet about their day. Therapy gives your child a safe place to process what is happening, separate the cruelty from the truth, and rebuild the confidence bullying wears down. We help your child find their voice again, and we support you in advocating for them at school.
How we help
The skills that rebuild confidence
Real confidence is not about telling a child they are great. It is built from skills and experiences. Therapy may help your child develop:
A healthy self-view
Quieting the inner critic and building a truer, kinder sense of who they are.
Friendship skills
How to make friends, handle conflict, and recognize what a good friend feels like.
Boundaries & voice
Speaking up, saying no, and standing up for themselves with confidence.
Resilience
Coping with rejection and setbacks without deciding something is wrong with them.
You are part of this
You are your child's first mirror
A child's sense of worth is shaped, more than anywhere else, at home. We coach you on how to build your child up in ways that actually stick, how to respond to negative self-talk without just arguing them out of it, and how to support your child through bullying or friendship pain in a way that helps them feel stronger, not more fragile.
Small shifts in how we respond can change the story a child tells about themselves.
The whole-child view
Confidence is connected to everything
How capable and steady a child feels is also shaped by sleep, stress, and how their days are going overall. Because we look at the whole child, we consider those pieces too, and coordinate with your pediatrician when it would help. You can read more on our whole-child services page.
Why families choose us
Confidence-building, whole-child care
- Real skills, not empty "you're amazing" reassurance
- Direct support for children being bullied
- Friendship and boundary skills that carry into real life
- The whole-child view, including stress and daily wellbeing
- A veteran-owned practice that understands kids who feel like the new one
- Coaching for parents on building lasting self-worth
- In person in San Diego, or telehealth across California
- A faith-integrated option for families who want it
Help your child believe in themselves again
Tell us what your child is facing. We will help them find their voice and their confidence.
Common questions
Parents often ask
How do I know if it's low self-esteem or just shyness?
Shyness is a temperament, and it is fine. Low self-esteem is a belief, that they are not good enough, and it tends to hold a child back from things they actually want. When self-doubt is shrinking your child's world, it is worth support.
My child is being bullied. What can therapy actually do?
Therapy helps your child process what is happening, protect their sense of worth from what is being said, and rebuild confidence and coping skills. We also support you in advocating at school. If there is a safety concern, that should be reported to the school and, if needed, the appropriate authorities.
My child says "I'm stupid" or "nobody likes me." What do I do?
Reassurance alone rarely lands. We help you respond in ways that actually reach your child, and we work with your child directly to soften that inner voice. Hearing it often is a good reason to reach out.
Can you help with friendship problems?
Yes. Making friends, handling conflict, and recovering from rejection are learnable skills, and they are a core part of this work.
What ages do you work with?
We work with children ages 5 and up, along with teens and families.
Do I participate?
Yes. Because home is where self-worth is built most, parent involvement is a key part of the work.
Do you take insurance?
New Birth is a private-pay practice. We provide superbills you can submit for possible out-of-network reimbursement, though reimbursement is never guaranteed. Current rates are on our fees page.
Do you offer telehealth?
Yes. We see families in person at our Mission Valley office in San Diego and by secure telehealth anywhere in California.
Explore related care
New Birth Family Counseling provides psychotherapy to clients located in California and offers whole-child, mind-body informed care for children ages 5 and up. This page is informational and does not constitute medical or psychological advice or a diagnosis. Every child is different, and outcomes vary.
Are you a pediatrician or provider looking to refer a child? Visit our professional referrals page.